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Huddled together in Sheldon Lee’s living room, Sheldon, Brad, and Tuck brainstormed about how to stop Epiphany Crust’s plans to record a commercial version of her humiliating song, “The Girl Who is a Robot,” with Tremorton’s local radio station, KWAK. Jenny Wakeman wore an actual groove in the floor as she paced back and forth. Nothing her friends suggested satisfied her. 

“Yes, I could end transmission by destroying the radio station’s antenna tower. And sure, I could infiltrate their computer network and destroy the original music files. But what’s to stop KWAK from repairing their antenna? What’s to stop Piff from going right back into the recording booth? Now if Piff couldn’t sing, or speak . . . say, if a discreet, well-directed laser beam severed her vocal cords . . .”

Sheldon jotted in a notebook and said, “Let’s add ‘mutilation’ alongside ‘murder’ on the bad ideas list.”

Jenny threw up her hands. “I thought the whole idea of brainstorming was that there were no bad ideas!”

“I have to agree with Jen here,” said Tuck. “You’re hampering the creative process.”

“No.” Brad scowled at his little brother. “We’re hampering the destructive process.”

“Oh, who am I kidding?” Jenny kicked at the subflooring she’d exposed with all her pacing. “I’m not going to hurt Piff. It goes against everything I’ve been programmed to believe.” She threw herself down into an easy chair, which collapsed under her robotic weight. “Unless I can change reality itself and make Piff into some sort of supervillain, she’s safe from any physical harm.”

Tuck rubbed his hands together, “Wow! Supervillain Piff vs. Superhero Jenny? That’s a fight I’d love to see!”

Sheldon said, “Well, unless you can manipulate quantum physics and access alternate universes, I’m afraid you’re out of luck.” He started to guffaw but stopped when no one joined in. “That was meant to be a joke.” 

Jenny stood up. “Wait! Go back. What was that that nerdy word you said? ‘Quantum’…? ”

“That was one of the nerdy words I said, yes,” replied Sheldon.

“I know I’ve heard that word before. . .” There was a digital beep and mechanical whir as Jenny’s pupils morphed into “rewind” symbols. After a minute she blinked her eyes back to normal and said, “Found it.” 

Light beams shot out of her eyes and projected a hologram of Dr. Wakeman, who was waxing scientific about the distant past. “. . . me during my ‘experimental’ college days. One wild weekend my lab buddies and I invented what we called a Quantum Kaleidoscope. Showed you all the possible patterns of reality. Beautiful. And headache inducing. Too much for the human mind to comprehend. Then Niels merged the machine with his portable atom smasher, which gave it the power to actually alter reality. Tried to use it to get a date to the Spring Fling and ended up turning the dining hall into a giant plate of spaghetti.”

 The image of Dr. Wakeman was briefly obscured by static as she broke into a fit of laughter. Stopping abruptly, she snapped into sharp focus again. She seemed to be looking straight at Jenny as she cautioned, “A very dangerous, world-destroying device.” Then she walked out of the holographic image with a dismissive wave. “I think it’s in the basement somewhere.”

Jenny ended the projection. She looked awestruck. “Wow. The perilous power to alter reality itself . . .” A giant smile spread across her face. “Now that’s what I’m talking about!”

As Brad and Sheldon exchanged worried glances, Tuck leaned back and said, “Destructive process complete.”